But, now, the famed Red Rocker and former front man for Van Halen is ruing his age, if only just a bit.

Because if he were 55 or 60, “I’d run for president,” Sammy says.

“I don’t know what would happen [except that] my wife would divorce me [he laughs]. But, I’d throw my hat in the ring, and I’d work my ass off to try and bring this country together.”

A question about the song “2120” off The Circle’s latest album, Crazy Times, started Sammy down this road. The song is about the dangers of erasing history instead of learning from it. For Sammy, it speaks to a larger crack in the world.

“If I could run, I’d go to my music friends—friends on the left, friends on the right—and I’d tell them, ‘We have fans from all walks of life. Let’s do concerts across the country and show people [how it’s done].’ Forget red and blue. We’d make this a purple country.

“We need people trying to mend this huge wound, our great divide. We need to get rid of the hatred.”

Sammy isn’t the only one thinking big picture in Lifestyle’s annual Men of Influence issue.

You’ll also meet the starting fullback for the Miami Dolphins, Alec Ingold, who’s raising awareness about and advocating for foster youth and adoption organizations. It’s not that Alec’s own adoption story is tragic. Just the opposite. His family created such a supportive and empowering environment that Ingold knew, early on, he wanted to pay it forward. He is. Ingold’s foundation is making a difference in the lives of youth from South Florida to Green Bay, Wisconsin.

Then there’s Andrew Koenig, our cover subject and CEO of City Furniture. Inspired by the business processes that have driven Toyota to the top of the automotive industry, Andrew, only 40, has turned an already successful company on its philosophical head—setting the stage for a future that couldn’t be brighter.

It’s an honor to feature so many inspired, positive and forward-thinking leaders in the pages of Lifestyle.

Enjoy the issue.

The post Editor’s Letter: Men of Ideas appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.

As the 2007 Disney movie Ratatouille plays in the background, much to the delight of the growing number of children gathering near an oversized poolside screen, parents can be heard reviewing the events of the day. Two dads are crowing about their exploits on the links at Four Seasons Golf and Sports Club; a mom raves to her friends about the 80-minute Healing Honey massage and exfoliation she enjoyed at the spa; another mom tells her husband she fell asleep reading her book at the adults-only Oasis pool overlooking the lake (one of five pools overall) while he was shooting hoops with their two boys.

The scene borders on suspicious, as if the Four Seasons promised free cocktails to 21-and-overs at the Family Pool who talk up its never-ending menu of amenities. And, yet, these are all spontaneous testimonials—insights that, in the bigger picture, only begin to touch on all that’s available at this epic 26-acre spread.

Accommodations: Since its opening in August 2014, Four Seasons Orlando has vowed never to rest on the brand’s laurels. Elevating the guest experience can be as simple as a seasonal promotion—or as all-encompassing as the recent renovation of its 14 Park View Deluxe Suites on the sixth through 12th floors.

Considerable thought went into the residential-style layouts, down to the neutral color scheme and light oak flooring meant to soothe after a day of on-site or theme park activity. Elements throughout the 1,000-square-foot rooms speak to a luxury level of sophistication and comfort that dazzles while remaining understated. The living area features a custom console that hides a coffee bar and refrigerator as well as a built-in banquette and table for in-room dining (there’s also a sectional sofa with a pull-out bed); the main five-piece bathroom (one of two in the layout) includes a deep-soaking tub; dual walk-in closets have marble valet tops and mirrors; and backlit walnut accent panels frame a king bed with underlighting. Then there’s the mammoth terrace (with table seating for four and additional chairs/footrests) from which guests can catch the nightly fireworks at both Epcot and Magic Kingdom.

For the ultimate Four Seasons experience with friends and family, ask about booking the 16th floor. The entire 16th floor. That gives your party top-floor access to the nine-bedroom Royal Suite, four-bedroom Presidential Suite, twice-daily housekeeping service, 24-hour in-room dining and more.

Fitness, Wellness and Sports: The resort’s fitness allure isn’t limited to state-of-the-art cardio and strength-training equipment—or even the personal trainers available for one-on-one instruction. There’s also daily classes in a variety of categories—think Thai touch yoga, music and movement sessions, low-impact aqua classes, core circuit training, and even classic rock spin classes.

On the spa side, offerings aren’t limited to honey-infused treatments. Facials include collagen-increasing intra-epidermal micro stimulation as well as a skin-quenching treatment that includes hyperbaric oxygen and hyaluronic layering. Among the touch therapies: vibrational sound therapy and cupping detoxification. Guests can also indulge in cryotherapy, couple’s massages, exfoliations, hair and nail care—and magical makeovers for your little princes and princesses.

The Tom Fazio-design Tranquilo Course is a par-71 tract with elevation changes unique to golf in this part of Florida. The 6,901-yard layout, amid protected wetlands, Southern live oak trees and ample wildlife, is a Certified Audubon Sanctuary. Racket enthusiasts can play on one of three Har-Tru tennis courts—or book a lesson with the resort’s on-site pro.

Dining: The steakhouse fare alone at award-winning Capa is worth the drive to Orlando from South Florida. Malyna Si, the only female chef in Central Florida overseeing a Michelin-star restaurant, leads a team that puts on a show every night of the week. The artfully rendered space boasts its own fireworks views from a top-floor balcony—along with a peek into the open kitchen and its wood-burning grill.

New dishes at Capa are inspired, in part, by Si’s recent foodie travels in Switzerland, Italy and Spain. Pulpo a la Gallega brings a caper, honey and black pepper glaze to octopus; Pipirrana, a traditional salad from the southern region of Spain, incorporates tomatoes, bell peppers, mango, papaya and pine nuts; Pescado delivers a lighter cobia to the seafood slate, complemented by summer squash and garlic tomato ragu; and Paella Valenciana introduces marinated rabbit to classic rice dish. On the steak side, Capa soars with prime cuts (like the bone-in New York strip and 32-ounce porterhouse from Creekstone Farms in Arkansas or the A-5 wagyu beef from Miyazaki, Japan). For dessert, don’t hesitate: Go straight to the churros and dipping sauces.

The restaurant offerings at Four Seasons don’t end at Capa. There’s modern Italian cuisine at Ravello and Latin American fare at Plancha. Also, don’t miss rooftop cocktails at Capa Bar—or, for the kids, breakfast with Goofy and friends at Ravello.

Bonus Highlights

• Visit the Disney Planning Center in the lobby for all of your theme park questions and services. There’s both complementary transportation in a luxury motorcoach to the parks and private car service that can be arranged. The center also can arrange a VIP guided theme park tour with customized itineraries and speedy access to attractions, as well as private character experiences with Mickey, Minnie and the gang.
•  Explorer Island provides its own brand of entertainment. It’s a mix of fun and games at The Mansion (table tennis, pool tables, bocce ball) and The Hideout (video gaming); sports (volleyball, basketball); and aquatic activities (including a lazy river, a splash zone and a sky-high water slide.
• Saturday nights at Explorer Island means a Kids for All Seasons takeover from 5 to 8 p.m. that includes dinner and special swim shirt for the kids.
• Sustainability and the environment are top of mind at Four Seasons Orlando. The 26 acres are brimming with different plant species (114) and trees (1,140 total); there 10 recycling stations throughout the resort; eight Tesla charging stations and two General Electric stations for electric-powered cars.

Address: 10100 Dream Tree Blvd., Lake Buena Vista

Contact: fourseasons.com/Orlando; 407.313.7777

The post Four Seasons Orlando Offers A World-Class Luxury Retreat appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.

His competitive embers burned as a youngster on fields of play and during games of Monopoly. And they burn even brighter now that he’s CEO of one of the top 20 furniture companies in the United States, City Furniture.

“The question,” Andrew asks from a conference room at City Furniture headquarters in Tamarac, “is how do we get to No. 1?”

Here’s an equally compelling question: How does the 40-year-old son of the company co-founder have City Furniture moving so quickly in that very direction? And why did it necessitate a 180-degree philosophy flip when it came to how an already successful operation ran its business?

To answer those questions, it helps to go back to the beginning.

Family Influences: City Furniture was still a decade away from its own birth when Andrew entered the world in 1983. Back then, the company founded in 1971 by his uncle, Kevin, was still Waterbed City. But as Kevin joined forces with his brother (and Andrew’s father), Keith, it soon became clear to the siblings that it would take more than an aquatic trend in bedding to make serious waves in the industry.

“I grew up learning about the business at our dinner table,” Andrew says. “My father always had people over to the house—vendors, members of his own team, others in the industry. You can imagine the conversations that were being had in 1992 and ’93 [leading to Waterbed City’s transition to City Furniture in 1994]. It piqued my interest, even as a kid.”

But it wasn’t just the business buzz that made a strong impression on Keith’s son.

“You could always tell how much people admired [Keith],” Andrew recalls. “There was a period where it felt like it he was being honored every week for his work in the community. It became the running joke in our family—what else can you possibly win, Dad? But we realized he was building something special.

“[Andrew and his sister, Daren] were beyond blessed. We’d look at each other sometimes and go, ‘This guy is awesome.’ He was the perfect mentor. And he’s still the perfect example of how to be a great human being.”

Though Andrew is now the CEO, he still talks to his father, multiple times, every day.

Fork in the Road: Though he doesn’t go into detail, Andrew admits that he had a good time at St. Thomas Aquinas High School. Too good. He rebelled a bit. He challenged authority. And he loved the South Florida lifestyle, hanging out with his friends and playing basketball and golf far more than classwork.

“I wasn’t a horrible kid, and I didn’t do drugs, but my priorities weren’t aligned yet,” he says. “I just wanted to have fun. And, sometimes, that fun was probably too dangerous.”

One night, Andrew remembers walking through the front door far past his designated curfew. His mother, Doreen, was in tears. His father, meanwhile, had reached the end of his rope.

So, he let it go.

“My dad looked at me and said, ‘OK. You have no more curfew. Do whatever you want.’

“For whatever reason, that hit me hard,” Andrew says. “They were that disappointed in me that, now, I had zero restrictions. I don’t know if that was some amazing reverse psychology or what. But it worked. Something started to switch inside me. It was a reset.”

Before long, Andrew was off to Elon University in North Carolina—where another, more profound revelation awaited.

Charting a New Course: Though learning the furniture business lingered in the back of his mind, Andrew entered college with tee-to-green aspirations. His skills on the links landed him a spot on the golf team at Elon, and he envisioned earning different kind of green as a professional. But then Elon started playing top teams from around the country.

“There were guys who must have been five years ahead of me in terms of golf talent,” he says. “I was going to have to dedicate every bit of my life to golf if I wanted to go pro.”

As one dream was fading, another was taking shape. Andrew was digging his business classes at Elon. Big time. (He’d earn his bachelor’s degree in accounting and finance.) And some of that actually spoke to his love of sports.

“It started to click for me that business is competitive,” Andrew says. “It also can be fun and strategic and team-oriented. All of the same things that I felt about sports.”

As his grades soared, so did his interest in what was happening back home at City Furniture, which was on its way to establishing itself as an industry leader in South Florida. Andrew returned to Broward County for his Masters in Business Administration at Nova Southeastern University.

He would leave with more than just his MBA.

Bride to Be: Andrew met his future wife, Deana, at Nova when they began working together on a competitive business project. Though she instantly caught his eye, he says she had a boyfriend at the time.

“I was playing hard to get the entire time anyway,” he quips. “The long game. It worked out well for me.”

About a year after they had completed their MBAs, the two ran into each other in downtown Fort Lauderdale. As Andrew tells the story, Deana’s friend pretended to be Deana on MySpace and sent him a message. Whatever the case, it led to a first date at Timpano, the storied Italian restaurant on Las Olas Boulevard.

“Her father [a general contractor] built homes [for communities] like Plantation Acres; she’d been working with her dad since she was a kid,” he says. “So, we had [the family business background] in common. When I met Deana, she wore so many different hats. She already seemed to be the matriarch of her family.”

She’s now the matriarch of her family with Andrew. The couple, who married in November 2014, have three children—Aaron (8), Daya (7) and Christian (6).

Paying His Dues: Andrew officially started at City Furniture in June 2006—as a marketing intern. He understood that people saw him as the nepotism kid, especially early on, but Andrew had a plan. He was going to learn City Furniture operations from the inside out. He made stops as operations supervisor, manager, director of operations, vice president of operations and marketing, chief operations officer before being named president of the company in January 2019.

I wasn’t going to earn anyone’s respect unless I did it side-by-side with everybody else,” he says. “It also was a way for me to become an expert at the business. It also went to that idea of competitive advantage. By doing most every job, I could help solve problems in those areas that needed to be solved.”

The simple idea of problem-solving was about to become the cornerstone of a philosophy that not only flipped the script on the way City Furniture did business—but positioned it to become one of the nation’s largest furniture companies.

Leaning Into It: In 2003, Andrew read The Machine That Changed the World by Daniel Roos, James Womack and Daniel Jones about the revolutionary business philosophy—lean production—that made Toyota the world’s top-selling auto manufacturer. The book changed his life. Lean emphasized decisions based on a long-term vision instead of chasing short-term financial goals. At its core was the concept of continuous improvement, a methodology called “kaizen” that engaged workers in all departments to create more efficient and thoughtful processes.

“In the early 2000s, City did not have a defined operating system of how we wanted to work together,” Andrew says. “There was still this hierarchy in American management that didn’t lend itself to strong communication between the front-line worker and the CEO. So, we were very ivory tower with Keith at the top. We had intent to do 50 things. We’d get five done.”

Keith reached out to the late Jim Moran of JM Family, who arranged for Andrew to tour Toyota headquarters in Japan. It validated everything he’d been reading about the philosophy. But, despite his son’s contention that “lean” was the future of City, Dad wasn’t sold. City had grown 800 percent over a 12-year span. Why fix what wasn’t broken?

“What makes Keith so great is that he kept reading about it,” Andrew says. “You’re talking about asking a guy who’d run a successful business for three decades to suddenly do it a different way. But I’d give him books on the philosophy, and he’d take them with him on his business trips. He was humble enough to learn.”

When the economy began to show early signs of the recession to come in 2008, Andrew asked his dad if the time was right to go lean.

“Go for it,” Keith told his son.

All In: Starting in 2007, Andrew began teaching the Toyota way to teams of 20 at City Furniture. At the time, he was fresh of out college and still an operations associate. A few years in, he realized it was better to train one person and a time to ensure the connection to and understanding of lean principles.

Not everyone bought in. Andrew says City lost two of its vice presidents early on. “We probably went through seven or more VPs over the past 16 years,” he says. “It wasn’t easy. It was tough for people who had managed a certain way for so long—including people who’d had built the business with Keith. But Dad knew in his heart that this was the right way to turn our business.”

The proof was in the kaizens.

Several early problem-solving projects bore immediate fruit. One kaizen involved how product flows in and out of the building. “That process had nine managers at one point,” Andrew says. “We got it down to one supervisor. We saved millions of dollars through that process. Another smaller kaizen resulted in a thousand percent productivity improvement. Fast forward. We did kaizen after kaizen in different areas of operation. We did one event for our repair shop. Literally, within a week of implementing the changes, we saved almost $20,000 in those five days.

“Suddenly, there was buzz about our lean strategy [since renamed the City Furniture Operating System]. We were off on our journey.”

Rethinking the Work Week: A few years ago, during a return trip to Japan, Andrew asked a Toyota executive about their strategic process and how many years out they plan.

“‘Oh, we plan 500 years out,’ he said. ‘We like to look really far into the future. That way, we take our egos out of the situation.’”

Letting go as managers can be counterintuitive, but it’s vital to the out-of-the-box mindset necessary for continuous improvement. Recently, City freed up 12 people from their day-to-day jobs for a week-long kaizen.

“We do it all the time,” Andrew says. “We want them to come together and solve a problem. If I showed you people’s allocations of time, you’d be amazed. We try to have our leaders spending 50 percent of their work week solving problems. That’s unheard of in organizations.”

Andrew also implemented “City Circles,” where teams of five solve issues and consider better systems one hour a week for 12 weeks. The group then presents its results to the senior team. Andrew also runs 80-hour leadership training courses; he estimates 10 a year for a combined 100-plus people.

Of course, there’s an immediate cost to cross-training and ongoing continuing education. But only, Andrew says, if you’re focused on the next quarterly results.

“We’re building something for the next 50-plus years,” he says. “We’re not going to be around because of my knowledge. If I can get everyone here as smart or smarter than me, solving problems in all aspects of the business, that’s the organization I want to be a part of.”

One of the Guys: When Andrew insists that communication drives the narrative, he isn’t just talking about the teams he oversees at 35 showrooms across Florida (21 City Furniture stores and 14 Ashley outlets) since taking over for Keith as CEO in January 2022.

Human resources gives all new hires Andrew’s personal cell number during orientation.

“I was in Plant City [over Labor Day weekend], and a couple of guys walked up to me and said, ‘Is this really your phone number?’ I said, ‘Call me.” My cell rang. And I go, ‘Told you!’ … To me, it makes total sense. The people working at our stores have the ideas. They’re going to tell me what I need to know. I’m not telling them to go to me instead of their boss. Do that first. But if you think I need to know, text me. Call me.

“It really creates a phenomenal culture.”

Looking Ahead: The clip at which City Furniture continues to grow shows no signs of slowing down. There are three showrooms underway in Tampa Bay and a fourth set for Daytona Beach. But expansion plans aren’t limited to just Florida. Like a chess master, Andrew is always thinking three, four moves ahead.

“I believe the furniture industry is moving in the same direction as the home improvement industry did. Back in the early 1980s, there were more than 25 home improvement regional centers, beyond just Home Depot and Lowe’s. Today, you only think of Home Depot and Lowe’s, and maybe a few others.

“The home furnishing industry also is going to consolidate over time. You need scale, you need buying power, you need technology, you need investments. I’ve been running our business with the mindset that there’s this invisible ticking time clock. The bigger are only going to get bigger—and we need to hurry up and get on that path. So, I’m happy with our growth the past few years. But we have to continue along that fast pace.”

Winning Ways: “I’m always interested in innovations. Or trying to figure out the root causes of something,” Andrew says. “I think that comes from my competitiveness. Whether it was trying to get better or gain an edge at golf or basketball.

“But in business, I’ve also learned that if you want to win, build an organization that’s constantly learning, constantly getting better. How can we identify problems, generate great ideas and solutions, and test them and get them implemented as quickly as possible? If you can do that—if you’re learning faster, solving problems faster—how can you not beat the competition?”

Giving Back

City Furniture’s pronounced philanthropic footprint extends to nonprofit organizations throughout South Florida. In recent months, the American Heart Association has honored Andrew and Deana Koenig for their ongoing commitment to AHA initiatives. Mission United, the program through United Way of Broward County that supports current and former military members, worked with City Furniture on a home makeover for a local Army veteran and her family. And the furniture company again partnered with the Miami Dolphins on the sixth annual Delivering Hope event, which delivered new bedding for more than 100 children.

This month, join City Furniture in its annual Pink Pumpkins tribute. The fourth-year initiative, which runs through Dec. 31, supports Making Strides Against Breast Cancer events by the American Cancer Society as well as ongoing cancer research. Visit any City Furniture or Ashley showroom (which will be decked in pink during October) and take a complimentary pink pumpkin bucket for Halloween to honor survivors and raise awareness. Andrew’s mother, Doreen, herself a longtime philanthropist, had the original idea for pink pumpkins even before she was diagnosed with breast cancer (Doreen lost her battle with the disease in 2015).

Andrew also is a member of CEOs Against Cancer, a collection of top executives seeking to “alter the trajectory of cancer care” in conjunction with the American Cancer Society.

Photography by Eduardo Schneider

The post City of Dreams appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.

“Number one, Rick is prettier than me,” Sammy Hagar quips amid a belly laugh. “Plus, he had a bigger hit with my song than I did [“I’ve Done Everything for You”] When I released that song [in 1978], it bombed. He comes along [in 1981] and has a top-10 record with it.

“So, I’m thinking, maybe he can do that with my rum!”

Truth be told, the former front man for Van Halen—whose 50 years in music, starting in the early 1970s with Montrose, includes a prolific solo career—was doing just fine on his own when it came to adult beverages. Long before the likes of George Clooney, Bob Dylan and The Rock had launched their spirit brands, the Red Rocker had bought and sold Cabo Wabo tequila, a multimillion-dollar venture that opened the industry door for other celebrities. Today, in addition to Beach Bar Rum, Hagar’s portfolio includes Sammy’s Beach Bar Cocktails (all-natural ready-to-drink rum concoctions) and his Santo line—Mezquila (the first tequila/mezcal hybrid], Tequila Blanco and Reposado.

As for his day job, Hagar shows no signs of slowing down. His supergroup The Circle—which takes the stage Oct. 29 at Hard Rock Live in Hollywood—has put out critically acclaimed new music (the 2022 album “Crazy Times”) and a delicious serving of raucous covers (“Lockdown 2020,” released amid COVID-19) over the past few years. Expect a major fall announcement about The Circle’s tour plans for 2024.

Hagar touched on music, spirits and much more during an exclusive interview with Lifestyle.

Your success with spirits is the stuff of legend. What originally piqued your interest about the industry?

I went to Guadalajara to shop for furniture for the Cabo Wabo Cantina [the famed bar and live music hub in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico that Sammy launched in 1990] as well as for the condo I had bought there. My Mexican partner suggested that we go to the town of Tequila—and drink some tequila. So, we visited three or four distilleries and sampled 100-percent agave. This wasn’t the tequila for [mass consumption]. You sit down with these farmers, and they want to show off their personal stock, not the stuff they’re selling to the guys across the street. This was from a recipe by the Rivera family, which had been making tequila for like 80 years.

It blew my mind. I thought, wow, when we open the cantina, I need my own tequila. I was so excited about the idea.

We talked to the right people, asked them to make this [same] tequila for the cantina, and they said, yes. Just bring us some bottles. So, that got me in. We bought these little barrels, and we’d serve the tequila out of that. There was no label. Someone tasted it, thought it was the best tequila he’d ever had, and he wrote an article. Soon, another person reaches out and asks if I want to bring the tequila to America. I said, “I don’t know what I’m doing. But, [expletive], sure.”

So, I went back to the farmers. Remember, I wanted the small batch that the ranchers made for themselves. They said “OK. Bring us more bottles.”

We started small, but then we started getting crazy orders. We went from hand-blown bottles to factory-made bottles. We couldn’t keep up with the supply. The good news was that I was dealing with the farmers—and they had all the agave. People ask how I pulled it off. That’s why. Pretty soon, the farmers were telling other clients, “Sorry, we can’t sell you anymore agave—we’re smoking over here with Cabo Wabo tequila!”

It was so much fun watching it grow, watching these farmers buy trucks to load agave instead of donkeys pulling carts—and, later, seeing them build mansions for their families. Watching all those people win, and me win, and seeing this tequila on a bar shelf? It was like hearing your song on the radio. It really put the hook in me.

When I sold it [an 80-percent interest to Gruppo Campari in 2007 for a reported $80 million], I’m going, “[Expletive!]. I want to do that again!” It’s like making a hit record. You want to make another one.

How many musicians and celebrities have approached you about different deals or just seeking advice?

Probably 20, 25 people or more have hit me up. Mainly, it’s about the liquor industry. The only advice I can give is that it’s a tough industry. I got lucky the first time around. The light just popped on one day. I didn’t plan that.

With these new brands, it’s much more of a struggle—and more of a huge investment. So, I warn people: If you have an extra $10 million to $40 million, you need to be willing to lose that if it doesn’t work. That’s the industry.

People also hit me up for investments. To me, it’s easier to make money than to keep it. I’m a conversative son-of-a-gun. I don’t try to make money with money. Betting on the stock market? Betting on someone else’s housing project investment? I’d rather put that money into my own housing project, one that I can control. Once you give other people your money, they don’t care about it as much as if it were their own money.

If I want to make money, I can play guitar and I sing. I have products. I can make appearances. And I can dig a freakin’ ditch if I have to. I’d rather do something and get paid for it than say, “I’ll put this money here and try to double it.” You might as well go to Vegas and have a good time in the process because it’s really like gambling.

Is there a business opportunity that you regret passing on?

Absolutely. There were so many real estate deals when I first went to Cabo and bought the Cabo Wabo footprint for $100,000. It’s a huge piece of property, right in the middle of downtown. I have no idea what it’s worth today.

People were also talking to me about buying property way out of town—50 acres on the beach for $500,000. Today, Mike Meldman [one of the founders of Casamigos tequila with George Clooney and Rande Gerber] has one of his Discovery [Land Company] properties there. And it’s $11 million to $20 million for one lot on the beach. He has about 200 lots. That $500,000 now probably would be worth $500 million or more.

But back in the day, I’m thinking, “A half-million dollars? In some piece of Mexican desert with a cactus on it?” [Sammy laughs]. There’s probably 10 deals like that I could have invested in. So, I’m not as smart as you think.

Let’s switch gears to music. You clearly love playing with The Circle. Why has this been such a satisfying chapter in your music journey?

It’s the first band I’ve been in that can play my entire catalog as good, or better, than the original group.

Alex Van Halen was a John Bonham fanatic. We never made a Van Halen record without him telling the engineer, “I want this drum sound.” It was always Led Zeppelin. It was “When the Levee Breaks,” “Good Times, Bad Times,” “Kashmir.” He was looking for that sound on our Van Halen records.

So, when we play Van Halen songs with The Circle, [drummer] Jason Bonham [John Bonham’s son] says in his British accent, “Oh mate, what Alex was trying to do was when my pop used to hit this high hat” or whatever it is. He knows exactly what Alex was going for. So, that’s one thing.

Then you have Michael Anthony. Back in the day, Alex and Eddie [Van Halen], and even David [Lee Roth], had their thumb on Mike so much. He’s such a fantastic bass player. He has hands and chops like John Entwistle [of The Who]. Plus, he sings like nobody’s business. So, having him off the leash is like, “Wow!” Mike is finally adding what he wants to play. He’s better than he ever was in Van Halen.

And Vic Johnson, once again, is the unsung hero. He can play Jimmy Page on Led Zeppelin songs. He can play Ronnie Montrose. And he can play Eddie Van Halen. He’s so incredibly versatile.

It breaks my heart that Eddie is gone [the legendary guitarist died in October 2020]. We never got together and played music again. That’s why we’re putting more and more Van Halen into our sets. Because the fans are never going to get that again. It just has to be played. We even have Mikey singing a couple of David Lee Roth songs [from early Van Halen], like “Runnin’ with the Devil” or “Ain’t Talkin’ ’bout Love.”

I love it. I get to take a little break and have a cocktail.

For five seasons, you were able to spend time with old friends and musicians you’ve long admired on “Rock & Roll Road Trip” (which ran from 2016 to 2020 on AXS TV). Which episodes stand out for you?

Every episode was a treat. But John Mellencamp is one because we became such dear friends after that show.

John is someone who can make you very uncomfortable because he’s such a bitter and angry artist. He always has been and always will be. We finished the interview and, yeah, it had been uncomfortable. When it was time to perform together, John wanted to do a murder ballad written by a blind guy in the 1900s. Johnny Cash and Bob Dylan had recorded it. I’d never heard of it. I tried to put some harmonies on it, and John goes, “No, no. No harmonies. Harmonies are wimpy.” We only played a part of the song because it has like 100 verses—and I was reading my verse off a teleprompter. So, he made it difficult for me.

But then, afterward, he goes, “Do you want to come up to my house?” I’m like, sure. I ended up staying all day, walking around his gardens, hanging out and just talking about old times. He played me some new songs, and I played him some new songs. That’s honestly one of the best “Rock & Roll Road Trip” outcomes. If I write a new song now, and I’m not sure about it? I play it on an acoustic, sing it into my iPhone and send it to John.

And he tells me straight [expletive] up what he thinks about it. There’s no ass-kissing. No consideration for my feelings. None of that. And I love it.

On The Circle’s latest album, “Crazy Times,” the poignant track “Father Time” stands out. You’re clearly taking stock because “Father time … is looking over [his] shoulder.” Is there a story behind that song?

This is about five years ago. [Sammy and wife Kari] were returning to our home in Maui. We lived way out in the boonies, on a cliff overlooking the ocean. You’d drive past these beautiful tropical palms and bushes until [the view opened up] and you’d see the house. By the time you reached the end of the driveway, you’d feel like you’d been there 100 years already. When you get in a place that peaceful, everything slows down immediately.

As soon as I’d get to that house, I’d take off my clothes and go naked until we had somewhere to go. Or until someone came to the house.

So, my wife goes to the store to pick up some things; it’s about an hour away to get to town. While she was gone, I picked up a guitar that I always had in Maui. This guitar has written almost every song since “Red Voodoo” [a 1999 album with his former band, the Waboritas], especially some songs that are really meaningful to me.

So, I’m sitting there near the cliff listening to the ocean waves crashing. The waves are rough on Waipio Bay; you can almost feel the house shake. “Crashing waves clawing at the shore … that’s been going on forever or more.”

I just started writing what I was feeling in that moment. I got my cell phone, hit record and started singing. That song wrote itself—music, lyrics and even the bridge. “I Can’t Drive 55” was like that too. That [song] came out of me straight, from beginning to end. Same with “Eagles Fly.”

After I finished, I was tearing up. I tried to play it again, and it broke me down. I could hardly sing it. So, I sent what I first did straight to John Mellencamp. And John went, “Sam, that song sounds like it’s been around awhile.” That’s [quite] a compliment from John. He’s saying that song is here to stay.

“Father Time” came from the ether. The spirits. The angels. From whoever was around me. That Maui property was very spiritual. And very scary at night sometimes, just because it was so still, so quiet and so dark. I sold it right before COVID-19 because it was falling apart.

But we owned it 27 years. That was my go-to, my sanctuary.

You have older sons (Aaron and Andrew) from your first marriage, and two daughters (Samantha and Kama) with Kari (his wife of nearly 30 years). How were you a different dad with the girls?

That’s a pretty deep question.

When I was young, I didn’t have businesses. I just sang, played music and toured a lot. So, I wasn’t around as much. When I was, we did everything. Hiking, swimming, I taught them how to fish, how to hit a baseball. That worked out well because if I had girls first, I wouldn’t want to play with dolls. [Sammy laughs]

With the girls, I’m in a [different place]. I’m not struggling. I think I gave them more security. The girls knew they had a dad; we all went together on summer tours. They also got a dad who was more mature.

But all four knew they were loved. That’s the one thing that will always carry through their whole lives and make them feel comfortable in the world. They have someone they can count on and turn to. … I was raised by a single mom, but guess what?  I knew she loved me. I never felt lonely, like I had nowhere to go. That’s a horrible feeling for a child.

I’ve seen so many miserable rich bastards in my life. All that matters to me, when I see someone, is that they’re open-hearted. They’re kind. And they’re willing to be kind to other people. That comes from being loved. Love is the key to everything.

Sammy Hagar & The Circle

When: Oct. 29, 7 p.m.

Where: Hard Rock Live, Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, Hollywood

What: Expect a rollicking evening of classic rock favorites with The Circle—bassist Michael Anthony from Van Halen, drummer (and Delray Beach resident) Jason Bonham and guitarist extraordinaire Vic Johnson—that draws from Hagar’s wildly successful career as a solo artist and front man for bands including Van Halen. In addition to hits and deep cuts from Hagar’s chart-topping run with Van Halen (1985-96), fans of the Red Rocker can rest assured they’ll hear songs like “I Can’t Drive 55” and “There’s Only One Way to Rock.”

Tickets: myhrl.com

The post Lifestyle Exclusive: Sammy Hagar appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.

The certified behavioral health technician (who earned her master’s in public administration at Barry University) has seen breast cancer journeys up close; both her mother and her childhood friend battled the disease. But, on a day-to-day basis, Joseph also sees women who don’t have access to, or who don’t know about, the resources available—support, especially when it comes to early detection, that can save lives.

It’s no wonder Joseph spoke with such emotion at a recent check presentation that launched the Women’s Health Center at BCOM in Hollywood. It’s a replication of the model originated by Promise Fund of Florida in Palm Beach County, one that, since 2018, has provided breast cancer screening, education and treatment for 20,000 women dealing with “financial and cultural health inequities.”

1) What’s something you see as a patient navigator regarding breast cancer awareness that might surprise women?

Socioeconomically disadvantaged individuals are typically not aware of the resources in their communities, that help is here and available. [At] outreach events, the feedback is typically, “Wow, I didn’t know you were here.”

One of the common barriers to care I encounter as a patient navigator [involves] language. South Florida is a diverse community, but patients who do not understand the need for screenings or the schedule at which they should have them … run the risk of gaps in continuous care. It’s a patient navigator’s responsibility to ensure that no patient gets lost in care.

Breast cancer is a disease that doesn’t discriminate by age. More women detect cancer at a later stage because they didn’t have a mammogram until they reached the qualifying age. By providing education—such as that women should regularly examine their breasts—we [help plant] the instinct to see a doctor if they notice a new lump, thickening or swelling of the breast, an inverted nipple, or any other alarming changes in their breast. They now know what to look for, so they quickly can take the next steps to diagnosis and treatment.

2) Was there anything specific about the cancer journeys of your mother or childhood friend (or both) that dovetails with the efforts The Promise Fund supports?

Centers for Disease Control has a list of identifying risk factors to help prevent breast cancer on its website. Studies have found that, with some risk factors, it’s in our power to change the potential of developing breast cancer; other risk factors, unfortunately, are out of our control. The Promise Fund’s mission is to address those health disparities so that women who can eliminate risk have the tools and resources to take charge of their health. My childhood friend lost her mother to breast cancer at age 5 and learned she had inherited the BRCA mutation from her mother. Contrary to my mother, who does not have the BRCA mutation, she may have had more control in lowering her chances. Factors such as healthy eating and physical activity are simple lifestyle [changes] that can lower your risk.

3) Where are the gaping holes in the health-care system that prompt women to disengage?

I strongly believe in having more engagement between providers and their patients. Patients are more likely to continue treatment if they are educated about the benefits of healthy living through their primary health-care team and the possible outcomes if treatment is missed.

For example, medications typically read “take as prescribed.” Like [many people], I discontinue the treatment once I feel better. [Then, I became educated] that if treatment isn’t completed, I may become resistant to that medication or even regain my symptoms. Once I knew that, I immediately took more interest in taking care of my body, asking more questions and, more importantly, building a relationship with my doctor.

4) How will the $900,100 in federal funding secured (by Congresswomen Debbie Wasserman Schultz) for BCOM impact women in the community?

The mission at BCOM is to provide accessible, comprehensive, high-quality primary and preventive care services to all persons with dignity and respect. The partnership and funding are to address breast and cervical cancer screening disparities in Broward County with the goal of increasing rates of early detection and diagnosis of breast and cervical cancer. This program will provide community screening, primary-care referrals, case management services and health education. BCOM also has secured the official launch of a mammography machine in the near future so that patients are not referred out. These funds truly are making a difference in the community.

5) Do you see parallels between your advocacy on behalf of women and the work you do for children, like your son, with special needs?

Absolutely. Advocating for early detection is a parallel for many different communities that suffer from health disparities. It’s always comforting to know that there are people out there, just like you, who made it through the storm. Hearing those success stories gives a sense of hope, even when the road seems tough or the light at the end of the tunnel seems unreachable.

As a patient navigator, autism mom and breast cancer daughter, finding resources can sometimes be challenging. There seems always to be one or two disqualifying components as it relates to coverage for treatment, whether it’s a couple of dollars over eligibility, or living a mile or two outside the radius of a treatment center. Getting a diagnosis can go many ways. Someone may hit the ground running, while another may need some time to process what’s happening. But eliminating that extra hurdle prior to treatment is what Promise Fund and BCOM have partnered to avoid.

The post Breast Cancer and The Promise Fund appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.

As the native of Wisconsin describes it, growth mindset involves prioritizing how you perceive things, separating identity from performance, and enhancing skills and intellect through hard work, dedication and positivity. He shares a conversation he recalls having with his parents during middle school. Alec was distraught over a B-plus because he so wanted to earn nothing but As.

“My parents asked if I tried my hardest, which I did,” Ingold says. “‘Then why are you upset?’ they said. ‘It’s the effort that matters. It was never about the grade.’”

This May, standing before a graduating class at Miami Dade College, Ingold offered a similar nugget as part of his commencement speech: Who you are, how you want to show up every day, matters so much more in life than what you do.

“These are messages that football coaches are telling us on a daily basis,” the 27-year-old says. “But the lessons all originated with that middle school conversation with my parents.”

The twist on what Ingold describes as an idyllic upbringing in the football haven of Green Bay is that his parents adopted Alec as an infant with the help of a faith-based organization. His mother, Chris, is a third-grade teacher; his dad, Pat, works on the office side of a Wisconsin paper mill. The couple still live in the same house where Alec grew up.

“I remember my dad waking up at 5 a.m. every day and staying late,” says Ingold, who has a sister, Sydnie, eight years his junior and the biological daughter of Pat and Chris. “Work ethic was so important to both of them. My dad was a [two-time All-American] wrestler at [Northern Michigan University]. So, I had him on the athletic side. And my mom was all over me about school and the importance of education.

“I was able to live with that family for my entire life, until I went to [the University of Wisconsin]. I never had realizations of how troubling foster care could be. Mine was a picture-perfect adoption story.”

Ingold’s ongoing appreciation for the impact that an empowering example can have on a young life has driven him to pay it forward. Last year, AdoptUSKids, a national organization that strives to find loving, permanent families for children and teens, honored Ingold in Washington, D.C., with its Adoption Excellence Award.

And with good reason.

Since entering the National Football League in 2019 with the Oakland Raiders as an undrafted free agent, and even during his standout career at Wisconsin (he was the only fullback invited to the 2019 Senior Bowl and 2019 NFL Scouting Combine), Ingold has looked for ways to give back when it comes to adoption organizations and the foster community.

“I always looked up to athletes when I was young; they were like superheroes to me,” he says. “There’s a responsibility that comes with this platform, and I try to carry it with awareness.

I’ve always wanted to use my testimony for good in the world. Being able to share spaces with kids that I can relate to? This is my lane. This is a journey I can walk during my playing days and long after.”

Early last year, he launched his namesake organization, the Ingold Family Foundation. It’s a culmination of the passions, interests and teaching moments that led Ingold to this point in his career—one that recently was rewarded by the Dolphins with a contract extension through the 2026 season.

“The vision was to take the pillars I’ve experienced in different areas—financial literacy (he earned a personal finance degree at Wisconsin), football/athletics, and family support—and invest in foster youth in elementary, middle and high school,” Ingold says. “We want to provide as many lessons as possible without [them having to] fight and claw for that kind of information. Somebody, beyond the teacher or caseworker. The hope is that it strikes a different or deeper chord.

“We’re trying to create environments of inspiration, where kids feel empowered to be themselves and chase their own dreams. Because, why not?”

Back in Green Bay, Ingold has hosted a Foster Youth Football Summit, reminding kids that family can be whoever is around you—including your teammates or your friends. He’s also partnered with the Pathways Program at the University of Nevada-Las Vegas, which encourages young adults who’ve been in the foster system to “design and create a personal vision for a well-lived and productive life.” Ingold’s own passion for financial literacy resulted in a Money Mini Camp.

Locally, since joining the Dolphins last season, Ingold already has connected with nonprofits including Junior Achievement of Greater Miami, Children’s Home Society Florida and the Jason Taylor Foundation. He says there are plans to bring some of the initiatives he launched in Green Bay to South Florida.

His interest in providing foundational skills for young adults speaks, in part, to alarming statistics from the National Foster Youth Institute, which reports that 20 percent of the estimated 23,000 children who age-out of the foster system each year in the United States instantly become homeless.

“There’s no support system at that point,” he says. “So, we’re trying to give them tools and relevant life skills [in their teens],” Ingold says. “How to budget. How to save. How to write a check. What’s your credit score? All these little things can add up and give you a better understanding of how to stand on your own two feet.”

Though his is a different backstory, Ingold says there are challenges he’s experienced that are relatable for foster and adopted children. For example, he’s dealt with identity issues since he was a child.

“I was afraid of mirrors growing up,” Ingold says. “I didn’t have that visual representation of what I was supposed to look like 30 years down the road. I was taller than both my parents by second or third grade. It was never a secret that I looked different. Identity was a hurdle for me, and I struggled to get over it.

“That’s what football was for me, in some ways. It was an escape from those identity issues. I loved being part of a team in youth football. I loved knowing that my job was going to help the person next to me.”

Still, Ingold is quick to note how fortunate he was to be raised in the warm embrace of a permanent family. Ingold’s parents even stayed in touch with his birth mother, exchanging occasional letters with her about Alec’s progress. When he was in the third grade, his parents asked if he would be interested in meeting her. He agreed.

“Honestly, I can’t remember now what she looks like,” he says. “It’s that visual thing. I remember her coming over and us having a nice conversation. She [made sure to explain] that me ending up with my parents wasn’t by chance. It was an educated situation of everyone communicating and making sure that I was being raised by the best family possible.

“I’m so grateful for that.”

After becoming a national spokesperson for AdoptUSKids following his rookie season with the Raiders, his birth mom reached out again. It was the first time they’d spoken since the meeting in third grade.

“She’s happy. And I’m doing what I’m doing,” he says. “It’s what it needed to be. It was a short chat, but cool.”

Having suffered a season-ending torn ACL in November 2021 (from which he fully recovered in time for the 2022 season with Miami), Ingold understands that players are only one hit away from turning the page on their NFL careers. Not only does he take none of his professional football journey for granted, but he’s always looking for ways to put his current platform to good use.

“To be able to host football camps, to do work through the foundation … it’s an opportunity for me to speak from the heart about football, about the lessons you can learn from teamwork and discipline. That might not get millions of views on Instagram. But, hopefully, it’ll change somebody’s life.”

Original photos by Eduardo Schneider

Action photo courtesy of the Miami Dolphins

The post Dolphins’ Alec Ingold Pays It Forward appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.

Wanderlust: Toro’s passion intensified while honing his skills at a culinary institute in Buenos Aires, as well as while traveling abroad in Europe and Latin America. In Belgium, Toro recalls being especially drawn to the Middle Eastern influences on that country’s cuisine. That interest broadened to encompass staples of Mediterranean dishes. Thus, began a love affair with “the spices, the ancient cooking, the simple ingredients, and the rustic, bold flavors,” he says, elements that permeate the menu at Olive & Sea. Toro’s degree in culinary arts includes a major in baking and pastry. Though his kitchen talent benefits from the precision and finesse he learned by creating desserts, it was an out-of-classroom episode that added the final ingredient to his approach. “When I was younger,” Toro says, “there was a chef who always used to say, ‘Fill your mind with beautiful things. Visit museums, walk through the woods, explore nature.’ He told me to express that in my cooking.”

Fish tales: At Olive & Sea, Toro’s past is clearly present on a tightly curated menu of Eastern Mediterranean-style dishes that are as flavorful as they are artfully rendered. The whole branzino al ha’esh speaks to the kitchen’s emphasis on superior sourcing and detail-rich preparation. European sea bass, delivered fresh each morning, is seasoned with spices from La Boite in New York City that are created uniquely for Olive & Sea. In this case, the fish is marinated for six hours in olive oil mixed with za’atar seasoning (a blend of dried herbs and spices), and salt and pepper. The branzino is then seared in a pan with light oil, clipped, then cooked for no more than three minutes. It’s served with a roasted couscous, and sauteed tomatoes and apricots—all of which is plated on a liquid bed of smoked orange butter that recalls a beurre blanc sauce.

Peak picks: Sourcing at Olive & Sea includes seasonal treats (think finger limes) and fresh produce from Harpke Family Farm in Davie. Toro is so insistent on serving nothing but the best that he’ll pull the Greek salad off that day’s menu if the heirloom tomatoes need to ripen for another 24 hours. “If it’s not perfect, we won’t serve it,” he says. Perfection is realized on the featured skewers—fennel-dusted swordfish, shawarma-spiced filet mignon, za’atar garlic chicken and lamb meatballs. The skewers are served with three dipping sauces—spiced tomato, tehina (the restaurant’s version of tahini but with added lemon to increase its tartness) and coriander-chili relish.

Pick of the Pies: The trio of pizzas on the menu may look out of place—until you realize that Toro and his team have incorporated rustic breads (freshly baked laffa crust, cooked in the state-of-the-art pizza oven) into the mix—as well as signature Eastern Mediterranean ingredients like halloumi cheese (a mix of goat’s milk and sheep’s milk). Selections include grilled shrimp, coriander sauce and feta; and pizza with smoked duck (more approachable for guests, Toro says, than a traditional bird like quail), olives, fennel and dates. “This opportunity at a Hilton spoke to my passion and roots,” Toro says. “It’s magical to bring together a team and open a new restaurant.”

Contact: 1881 SE 17th St., Fort Lauderdale; 954.527.6716; oliveandseaftl.com

Photos by Kenneth Smith & Will Pryce

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Best Practices: When the executive chef position opened this winter at Bourbon Steak in Aventura—one of seven Bourbon Steaks in the Mina empire—the boss knew who to call. In addition to his time with Mina, Beabraut’s kitchen career includes restaurants by Thomas Keller, Daniel Boulud and Gordon Ramsay. “I’ve purposely taken steps back as a cook just to work different stations with those teams and learn more,” Beabraut says. “It’s led to a repertoire of [skills and techniques] that now comes naturally.” For example, he perfected the potato gnocchi new to the Bourbon Steak menu by making 15 pounds of it a day while working with Angela Hartnett at [since-closed] Cielo in Boca Raton. His version features broccolini two ways (crispy tops and sliced stems that are blanched and picked up in butter) and cipollini onions prepared confit and brûlé (sliced/burned) style. A spicy Calabrian chili pesto stewed with pine nuts and garlic adds the finishing touch.

Salad Days: Another instant classic that Beabraut brought to the menu speaks to his love of crunch. The kale salad utilizes baby kale along with the heartier black kale, which the kitchen slices thin. A thick tahini turmeric dressing lights up the palate with nutty flavoring from the sesame seed paste and acidity from the champagne vinegar and lemon juice. Florida citrus further enlivens the taste, while quinoa and pine nut deliver the crunch. For good measure, bee pollen “ties it all together,” Beabraut says. Even diners who’ve never found kale to their liking are regularly ordering the salad.

The Beef: Of course, what would any discussion of Bourbon Steak be without referencing the world-class selection of prime cuts (filet mignons, rack of lamb, an 18-ounce Delmonico ribeye, a 40-ounce porterhouse), as well as Japanese and Australian wagyu offerings? Beyond the sourcing, what distinguishes Bourbon Steak is the preparation. Mina’s innovative butter-poaching technique—in which the cold meat is slowly tempered before cooking by floating in an immersion circulator filled with an herb-infused butter bath. The treatment leads to a more even sear, a tastier crust and beef that seems to melt in your mouth.

Menu Stars: Other highlights on Beabraut’s wonderfully curated menu include short ribs that are grilled before being braised, lending a smoky roasted flavor to the beef. The dish also includes popcorn grits—juice from raw corn is thickened into a pudding consistency, flavored with Parmesan, butter and cream, then fortified with charred corn and blistered shishito peppers. Beabraut is equally excited about the fennel-crusted salmon that’s dusted with dehydrated lemons and oranges that are pulverized and mixed with fennel pollen and salt. “I love how the nutty brown butter flavors come together with the fennel and citrus,” he says.

Contact: JW Marriott Miami Turnberry Resort & Spa, 19999 W. Country Club Drive, Aventura; 786.279.6600; bourbonsteakmia.com

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For years, Nikki has been identified with the man she describes as an amazing father to her three young children, as well as a basketball genius, Miami Heat head coach Erik Spoelstra.

But this day belongs to Nikki. It’s her time to confidently rock stylish looks during a photo shoot that lights up the resort. It’s her moment to peel the onion and shed light on a past that, by her own admission, is far from perfect. It’s her day to break down walls. To cry. To empower. Over the course of the next hour, with the recorder back on, Nikki is more than just an open book. There’s a sense of wonder in her eyes, as if she’s seeing her own life in focus for the first time.

Perhaps she is.

To that end, her journey of self-discovery—one that continues to be fueled, in part, by “the space of honesty, vulnerability [and] creativity” that she launched two years ago, her popular podcast “The Know with Nikki Spo”—recalls another recent summer blockbuster.

“It’s literally impossible to be a woman,” America Ferrera’s character, Gloria, says during the inspired monologue in Greta Gerwig’s Barbie that instantly went viral. “Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we’re always doing it wrong.”

For too long, a version of that sentiment resonated with Nikki. But so much of what’s happening in her life now, starting with the sobriety she’s embraced for the past three-plus years, doesn’t just feel right.

It feels transformative.

Asked to compare the South Florida girl born Nikki Sapp with the 36-year-old woman she is in this moment, the former Miami Heat cheerleader, art gallery director and schoolteacher doesn’t hesitate.

“Nikki Sapp was starving for love and attention and affection and hope,” she says. “The biggest difference today is that I know myself. And I love myself, flaws and all. I love who I’ve become.

“I want women everywhere to know that they are capable beyond measure—that they should always strive for more in the event that they’re not happy where they are. I’m not just talking about [romantic] relationships—I’m talking about friendships, jobs. My influence isn’t that I married somebody powerful. My influence is that I’m true to myself. And I want the women that I come into contact with to be true to themselves too.”

Family Matters

As if to further emphasize the point, Nikki notes that she stopped all contact with her mom, an estrangement that lasted eight years until her death last winter at age 73. Nikki did arrange for her mom to be in a nursing home, paid for by the Spoelstras, so she could receive the medical care she needed toward the end. “But an [in-person] relationship with her was no longer healthy for me,” Nikki says.

There was a time, toward the end of Pan Am’s run as “the world’s most experienced airline,” when Nikki’s mother was living the high life—and loving every second of it. The glamorous world of globetrotting had given her an identity, one that she cherished. But she lost that identity soon after Delta acquired Pan Am in 1991. With her flight attendant days behind her, Nikki’s mom began living a different kind of high life.

“She drank jugs of cheap wine,” Nikki says. “My dad was a firefighter in Miami Beach, so with his schedule he wasn’t around for all of it. But I have memories as early as age 4 of Mom falling asleep drunk, and me making my own dinner and taking care of the house at night.

“There were parts of my childhood that were wonderful. I was an only child, and my parents were supportive. Mom was a functioning alcoholic; she came to all my dance recitals, and she was even a substitute teacher at my elementary school. But it was Jekyll and Hyde; everything changed when the sun went down. There was a lot of loneliness. And feelings of having no respect for authority. It shaped who I became. And it shaped my coping mechanisms.”

In middle school, she coped for a period of time by harming herself. Nikki would hold a lighter to a pair of tweezers and scald her skin with the red-hot metal. “I just wanted to feel physical pain because I needed the emotional pain to make sense,” she says.

Though competitive dance and cheerleading at Top Gun All Stars in Miami provided a heathier outlet into her years at Killian Senior High School, Nikki couldn’t escape the not-so-subtle messaging that led to a simmering brew of resentment, sadness and rage.

“There was this pressure on me to be beautiful,” Nikki says. “Especially with my mom and [the way she conflated beauty and relevance] as a flight attendant with Pan Am. She was a gorgeous woman, a total knockout. So, now, this was my gift. College wasn’t important. Being attractive was how I was going to survive in the world.”

But survival wasn’t without episodes that further undermined Nikki’s sense of self.

“Around age 12, I was being bullied because my ears stuck out. Eventually, my parents paid for a procedure that allowed the ears to fold back and look normal. But prior to that, we’d pin my ears back with double-sided tape so they wouldn’t stick out. We’d laugh about it. But it wasn’t funny to me. And it hurt.

“Parents do their best, and I’ve reconciled this now. There’s no blueprint on how to raise children. But I remember being super resentful about this in my 20s, thinking ‘Why couldn’t they have taught me to be beautiful on the inside!’ ”

Though her mom had small windows of sobriety, Nikki says they were short-lived. Her mom didn’t attend her wedding to Erik in 2016. And she never met Nikki’s two boys—Santiago (age 5) and Dante (who turns 3 in December). Ruby, the Spoelstras’ youngest, turns 1 this month.

On Her Own

There’s a street-smart quality to Nikki that she carries as a badge of honor. She started working in her teens at places like Cold Stone Creamery, P.F. Chang’s and Coach, learning early lessons about saving and budgeting. Not that she had a choice. After her parents divorced, Nikki was living with her father. But when he remarried, Nikki found herself in a “Cinderella-like situation.” The new wife asked Nikki to leave, and then she moved her own family into the house.

Nikki also was told to pay for her own college. At times, she says, she held three jobs to cover her monthly expenses while working toward a degree in art history (with a focus on photography, contemporary art and Latin American studies) at Florida International University. Starting at 18, the years she’d spent perfecting her passion paid dividends when she began a three-season run in the mid-2000s as a Miami Heat dancer.

Even then, as the world seemed to be opening up for her, the past was never far from her present.

“During the years with the Heat, I was this platinum blonde with [a curvaceous figure],” Nikki says. “And I remember being at FIU and asking students after class if they wanted to study together. I’d get that look, like, ‘No, not with this bimbo.’ I was building some confidence then because I was doing well in school [she graduated magna cum laude], but it played into one of my biggest insecurities—that I’m not intelligent enough.”

No Holding Back

It’s no coincidence that Nikki invited Lauren Book, the Florida senator and founder of Lauren’s Kids, to be her guest on the premiere episode of “The Know,” which aired in April 2021. Both women could speak from experience about the topic of childhood trauma. Book, who was sexually abused for six years by her nanny, created the nonprofit organization Lauren’s Kids to help prevent such horrors from happening. Nikki says she experienced her own episode of sexual abuse as a youngster, one she classifies on the less-severe side without going into detail. Still, Nikki never told a soul about the incident until she was 27.

 “Part of what happens when you stuff these memories down, or you don’t confront them, is that you learn not to trust yourself,” Nikki says. “That’s a huge betrayal to yourself. I went through my life not trusting my own memory.”

When she finally opened up about the incident, she dealt with another betrayal.

“People doubted me,” she says. “I think it’s two things. First, people are uncomfortable; they don’t know how to hold that information. But there’s also a discrediting that happens, like, ‘Oh, it couldn’t have been that bad.’ Another guest on the podcast, [trauma psychologist] Andrea Loeb, talks about how it’s not necessarily the severity of the trauma that determines whether a person is capable of healing; it’s whether they’re believed. I felt invalidated.”

In the bigger picture, Nikki wanted to set a definitive tone with the debut episode of her podcast. This wasn’t going to be a fluffy Real Housewives-style joyride. The first 110 podcasts recorded through early August served to drive that point home.

State senate candidate Janelle Perez spoke about surviving Stage IV follicular lymphoma—at age 28. Virginia Akar, CEO of Girls Inc. of Greater Miami, addressed education equality for young females in underserved communities. Will Beck opened up to listeners about surviving the 1999 mass shooting at Columbine High School in Colorado. Other experts discussed everything from reclaiming your sexual power to creating healthy habits with food to maintaining your mental health.

More than once over the first few years, Nikki also has shed candid light on what she describes as the beginning of a great awakening in her life, an eyes-wide-open healing journey that is allowing her, at long last, to put the past in perspective.

Her own sobriety.

Turning Point

Nikki describes herself, prior to April 18, 2020, as a combination social drinker, binge drinker and closet drinker. When word broke about her relationship with Erik in the mid-2010s, one of the first stories that appeared was a gossip column piece that included Nikki’s mug shot from a DUI incident in her 20s.

“At the time the story came out, I was teaching [at SLAM! Miami, a sports leadership and management charter school],” Nikki says. “It was shameful. But I was also being harassed—like, how can you let a drunk driver become a teacher? After we married, I thought, I can’t ever publicly humiliate my husband. But after the kids are in bed, I can have a drink. I was part of the whole Mommy wine culture, which is so bad.

“I was becoming just like my mother.”

Asked what led to her increased drinking, Nikki mentions the post-partum anxiety she suffered after Santiago was born in 2018. And the challenges that come with being the wife of a high-profile professional. “It’s beautiful to be married to someone who is so passionate about the work they do; it’s like being married to an artist,” she says. “But having a family changes everything. There’s so much travel. Families aren’t together for holidays. For birthdays. Part of why I was numbing was because I was so lonely.”

In the same breath, Nikki is quick to acknowledge the broader canvas and her role in it. It was easier to drink than to deal with the complexities of her upbringing and the baggage that weighed on her.

“My life had become unmanageable,” she says. “Anybody from the outside would be like, ‘This chick’s life is perfect.’ But my inner world, my emotional world, was crumbling. I was stressed. I was upset. I couldn’t control my feelings. And, at times, I didn’t want to exist. I had two children then, and a small part of me is thinking, ‘I’m such a terrible person that my kids are better off without me.’ ”

The simmering inside finally reached a boil on that mid-April night in 2020. Nikki recalls running through the house, screaming obscenities. The next day, she admitted to herself that she was powerless over alcohol.

Months earlier, Nikki had met a woman who she felt was “pure magic in human form.” Until they became casual friends, Nikki didn’t know the woman was an addict with 13 years of sobriety. After hitting her “rock bottom,” Nikki called the woman.

“When she arrived at my house, she said, ‘It’s crazy that you called me. I was just contemplating taking a gummy and breaking my sobriety. You just saved me.’

“The universe works in mysterious ways, doesn’t it?”

Nikki’s friend paid it forward. She’s been her sponsor ever since.

Over 90 days, Nikki attended some 90 meetings for recovering alcoholics. In addition, she began working a 12-step program. It’s a defining period, she says, that was again met with skepticism and invalidation.

“I don’t think any of the loved ones in my life actually believed that I was an alcoholic. I think they just thought that I was crazy. And I felt like I was crazy,” she says. “But I had legitimate reasons to be angry. I didn’t need to be shamed for having big feelings. I needed help coping with them.

“As I got sober, I started to rediscover who I am and what I’m willing to accept in my life. What boundaries I’m willing to have placed on me. And what boundaries I’m not willing to have placed on me. I discovered that I have to be authentic to myself. And if I can’t be myself in a certain environment, then that’s not an environment I need to be in.”

Her Time to Shine

When Nikki calls herself “the baddest bitch I know,” it’s not because she’s ready to throw down inside a UFC cage. She’s immensely proud of being present and resolute for her children, of taking accountability for and addressing her past, of making amends for the mistakes she’s made and the people she’s hurt, of strengthening the foundation of her sobriety—and doing it all while handling the emotional cards life has dealt over the past few years.

Even though they were estranged, her mom’s death in the winter of 2022 felt like a “final blow,” Nikki says. “There was sadness in that I never got to have the mom that I wanted.”

In March of last year, the day after his fourth birthday, Santiago underwent surgery at Nicklaus Children’s Hospital. He’d been complaining for too long about flares of stomach pain. Nikki advocated for her son after reading about intussusception, a potentially life-threatening condition where a portion of the intestine slips into another section, like how a telescope collapses into itself. She pushed for and received an ultrasound prescription for the next time Santiago complained of the pain.

Sure enough, Santiago had dead intestinal tissue due to intussusception. The surgery at Nicklaus to remove it revealed a mass that, per standard procedure, was sent to pathology. A week later, an oncologist spoke to the Spoelstras about treatment options for the unthinkable. Their son had been diagnosed with Burkitt lymphoma, an aggressive form of non-Hodgkin lymphoma. Santiago underwent months of chemotherapy treatment at Nicklaus.

“He’s good now; he’s healthy,” Nikki says. “He’s like a little old soul. He understood everything that was happening. He’d say, ‘I’m taking medicine that makes my hair fall out—but my hair is going to grow back even better!’ ”

Amid everything, Nikki was pregnant with Ruby, who entered the world in late September. Becoming a mother was never the end-all, be-all for Nikki that it is for some women. She didn’t feel equipped, given her upbringing. But today, she says, “the toolbox is filling up.”

“I’m not a perfect mom. I wasn’t a perfect daughter or friend. But I’m working on those imperfections—and talking about them,” she says. “I’ve always had a voice, but somehow it felt stifled. Now, I have no restrictions. I can say whatever I want.

“I hope that people feel empowered by the things we [address] on the podcast. I want to normalize conversations and destigmatize certain topics. Hopefully, we’re helping people in some capacity—even if it’s just one person. Maybe that one person is me. If so, I’m good with that.”

Nikki pauses and wipes away a tear.

“I cry for this version of myself that I am today,” she says. “Because I’m so happy. I have a second chance at my own life.”

A few minutes later, the digital recorder is turned off. Nikki notices this. As she stretches her legs, a playful smile appears.

“So,” she says, “did I give you a good interview?”

Photography by Eduardo Schneider

Shot on location at JW Marriott Miami Turnberry Resort & Spa in Aventura

Hair/makeup by Grace Aguado at Your Face by Grace

Special thanks to Emily Quintero, Cari Farinas and the staff at Turnberry

The post Nikki Spoelstra Shares Inspiring and Impactful Journey appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.

The South Florida resident, born Gabriela Bueno, looks every bit the social media sensation she’s become for her polished pop music videos on YouTube and her playful short takes on TikTok that make the most of her supple dance rhythms and curvaceous Brazilian beauty. Over the past two years, videos for four of her singles—two high-energy collaborations (“Pretty Girl Lit” with Justina Valentine and “Earthquake” with Mikaila Murphy) and two solo efforts (“Belly Dancer” and the soulful “One Too Many,” released in March)—all have eclipsed 1 million views.

Meanwhile, her popular TikTok page (gabbyb_music)—which exploded amid COVID-19 thanks to a single video that captured Gabby at her hip-shaking best—now has 3.7 million followers and more than 45.1 million overall likes.

It’s the kind of success as a singer and dancer that the 23-year-old dreamed about as a youngster. In those days, though, the dreams were as much about escaping as they were about realizing her potential.

An only child to parents who know all about being in the spotlight—her mother, Michelle Honnie, delighted audiences as a Samba dancer and singer; her father, Mestre Leitao, has gained international renown as a Brazilian martial arts master in the discipline of capoeira (which combines dance, acrobatics and spirituality)—Gabby grew up on the move.

Her family left Brazil when she was 3, settling in Avignon, in the southeastern Provence region of France. Seven years later, they moved to North America, where Gabby spent middle school and ninth grade shuffling between Massachusetts and Canada. The family finally settled in South Florida; Gabby spent two years at Broward County high schools before finishing her senior year at home.

What happened during her traditional classroom years speaks to her current role as official ambassador for Boo2Bullying, a youth development and suicide prevention nonprofit that offers resources and support for those who’ve struggled with bullying and discrimination.

Gabby (who just released her latest single and music video, “Leche”) opens up about the incidents that shaped her childhood—but that ultimately led to the inspired example she’s setting for fans of all ages. (For info about new music, pop-up events and club appearances in South Florida, visit gabbybmusic.com.)

You’ve been candid about the bullying you experienced as a youngster. What kind of impact did those incidents have on you growing up?

I started having an imaginary friend when I was young. Her name was Diana. And I started spending a lot more time with my Barbies. That’s where my obsession began. I have over 300 Barbies in my room right now, plus the Dream House. For me, it was a way to combat the loneliness [and pain] from the bullying. Barbies made me feel comfortable. That was my safe space.

When we lived in France, the bullying was more physical. Kids would act like your friend, and then they’d push you down or spit on you. One kid bullied me all the time at recess. He’d kick me and pull my hair. It wasn’t just me, though. Other kids were getting bullied at that school. But the teachers wouldn’t do anything. One girl dug [her nails into Gabby’s hands] and it left me bleeding. I showed the teacher, but the girl said I started it by pushing her. So, we both got in trouble.

I was one of the only Brazilian girls, but [in retrospect] I don’t know if it was about that. Like, there were a lot of kids at that school from the Middle East. I do know my parents suffered with me. So, we moved to Massachusetts.

What kind of bullying did you encounter there?

That was racism. It was surprising because there were a lot of Hispanic people there, including other Brazilians. But the popular kids were the skinny blonde girls with blue eyes, the football players. I wasn’t the only brown girl at my school, but there was this discrimination against foreigners. Even the teachers would make me feel dumb because I didn’t know the language very well. I had this French kind of accent when I spoke English, and people in class would laugh at me.

I did have a friend, this cute white girl, and she had been good to me. But she had this other friend who had a birthday party. My friend invited me to the party. I was 12. When I got to the party, the other girls were all white. And they kept staring at me. It was weird. And it made me feel awkward.

At one point, the birthday girl went to talk privately to her parents. The parents came up to me and said that they’d have to drive me home.

They kicked me out of the birthday party.

My friend did offer to leave with me, but I told her to stay. I was so upset. I’ve never cried so much.

These are such formative years for a young girl. What was this doing to your self-esteem?

[Tears begin streaming down Gabby’s face, and her voice cracks as she speaks.]

I started disliking my own skin. I didn’t like my hair. For the longest time, I wanted to be blonde. I didn’t like myself or the way I looked. I wanted to be white, so badly.

It wasn’t until much later, as my music career started to [blossom], that I began accepting my skin as it is. I’d even avoid the sun because I tan so easily.

Did music play a role in helping you survive these years?

Music always helped. When I listened to Whitney Houston, Britney Spears, Mariah Carey, Christina Aguilera, I felt better.

Whenever I watched artists on TV, I’d imagine what it would be like to sing and dance on stage. I always dreamed about it. Part of it was the idea of proving all these kids wrong—I can be cool!

I could envision all of them being in the gym, at some assembly—and me performing these songs that I’d grown up on.

But I always felt a bit like the ugly duckling. I did go out for school plays, but I never got the main roles. The pretty blonde girl would be the lead character—and I’d be cast as the tree.

Finally, in high school after we moved to South Florida, I had a chance to play Fiona in a musical production of Shrek. But I declined. … That’s a whole other story that speaks to a song I wrote—“Lost with You”—about a boy, my first love, who controlled everything that I did. He didn’t want me to be a dancer or a singer. He didn’t want me to do anything. The reason was that he wanted to be a pastor. He was religious to the point where if God told him to jump off a bridge, he might do it. So, every time I wore something tight, something that felt right to me, he would make me feel bad.

Did that experience impact your feelings about relationships?

Right now, I don’t want anything to do with a boyfriend. I haven’t wanted that in years. … I’ve just been focused on my music. My songs have been more of an anti-love type of thing.

When did you begin taking steps toward a career in music?

It started with trying to grow my social media. Danny Adelstein, who’s my manager now, was my best friend before any of this. He’d help me with Instagram. I didn’t know where it would lead. Music is so hard to break into. I thought more about the actress side of it—performing in musicals, where I could sing and dance and be someone else. I used to do that on a day-to-day basis as an escape. I’d go to school and secretly pretend to be a vampire. I was a weirdo.

During my senior year, Danny’s dad [Mitch Adelstein], who’s my godfather now, heard me sing. He’s the one who made it possible for me to start in music, and I’m so grateful for him. I was just singing for fun, but he was impressed. Out of nowhere, he offered to invest in my career. [Note: Adelstein is the owner of the Chicago Sports Spectacular, the Midwest’s largest sports collectibles show. He ultimately started a music label for Gabby, Muy Bueno.]

We started doing cover songs, pop songs, in English, Portuguese and French for social media. Then we went to Atlanta, where I recorded my first song. I didn’t write it. I had songs in my diary, but I wasn’t ready for that yet. We did three songs and made videos for all three. Right now, I’m hating my first song—which was “Under My Skin”—because it’s too bubbly. It’s me as a person, but it’s not me in my music. I’m more aggressive as a performer.

But you didn’t go viral as a singer. Your big push came from a dance video, right?

We were doing serious music but also posting silly videos with [other artists’] viral song sounds. I posted one of those videos the day after everything shut down [due to COVID-19]. I had filmed it in Chicago. It’s just me dancing, the way people dance in Brazil. It’s like belly dancing but more aggressive.

But people thought I was a belly dancer. It blew up first in India. Some of the people there actually thought I was Indian. Overnight, I went from 10,000 followers on TikTok to 100,000. That video now has over [41.2] million views.

Because of that, I became a professional belly dancer [in the sense that] record labels in other countries would pay me to belly-dance to their artist’s songs. They wanted my audience. I used to do that a lot.

Later, when my followers heard me sing, they started enjoying that too. Eventually, I did a song called “Belly Dancer.” I studied the belly dance culture, learned more about it and worked with a teacher before recording the song and video.

Suddenly, I’m this social media influencer—and it all started because of belly dancing.

How does the attention you receive now—as a talented, empowered, beautiful woman—resonate with you given everything you’ve been through?

I was a blonde in the beginning of my career, still trying to be white. But since around age 19, I slowly started getting back to my natural hair. And then I stopped straightening it and started leaving it curly. Now, I even get my Brazilian tan because it’s a famous thing to have that tan line. I’d never do that before. But I don’t care now.

I think it’s because of the way my career has gone—and mostly because of my fans.

There’s this app called Likee for younger kids. I have about 700,000 followers, and many of them are little girls, some as young as 5. I hear the stories from them. “This kid at school called me stupid and ugly. But I love you Gabby, you inspire me.”

Now that I’ve shared my story, kids are asking me for help. It’s positive for them to see that there’s another person out there who’s gone through the same things. They’re not alone.

Social media is still a bully platform, and it can be brutal. The more popular you are, the more hate you get. But, oddly, it’s made me even stronger. I’ve gone through way worse in real life. All of the [support and positive feedback she’s received from fans] has helped me with my own insecurities. They give me so much confidence.

The post Gabby B Shakes It Up appeared first on Lifestyle Media Group.